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The Heaviness of it All

Tuesday, February 28, 2023

Primary Blog/The Heaviness of it All

The Heaviness of it All

    I don't know about you, but sometimes I just feel TIRED. Life feels HEAVY.

I talked with a client yesterday who described her life with those two words. I could relate. As she shared her thoughts, I felt a connection with her about the mama love she was feeling for her daughter, whom she desperately wanted to help. She was wearing herself out trying to overcompensate for the love she was certain her daughter was not receiving in her marriage. This dear woman was trying to do the job of loving her daughter for everybody she didn't think was doing it sufficiently, just to be sure her daughter was being loved enough.


I don't think it's even possible.

No wonder she felt WEARY.

The thing is, this wonderful mother, a woman who loves hard and deep and wide, held the perfect amount of love already for her daughter. And that's enough. Job done. Because she can't love her daughter for her daughter--that's her daughter's job. And she can't love her daughter for her daughter's husband--that's his job. No matter how much she wants to, the only person she can love her daughter for is herself. But the good news is, that's all her daughter needs her to do!

It's more than enough!

And recognizing that is wonderful because this beautiful mother realized she has plenty to be happy about when it comes to her daughter. Her thoughts turned from sad ones, to HAPPY ones. While the circumstances didn't change, her thoughts about the circumstances did, and suddenly her heart didn't feel so heavy any more. She felt something she hadn't felt in a while, something like HOPE. Something like RELIEF. Something like REST from the incessant worry.

As mothers, we do tend to worry. We do love hard. We want to protect our children and to assure they are engulfed in constant, effulgent love, love that will see them through the hard times. But what if we taught them to love themselves instead? What if we empowered them to hold enough love inside for themselves so that they are never lacking? Now, THAT is mama love!

And you can do it. Start now. We will keep talking about how, and until then--don't you worry.

You've got this!

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Hi, I'm
Lori Conger

Certified Life Coach at
You Got This

Ever wish you were the perfect mom? What does that even mean to you? And what if you are "perfect" already because you are you. And motherhood is messy and crazy, right?

​As a mother of five, I know all about messy! I also know how to find the perfect in it all so I can thrive and be who I want to be.